Tigertarkla In Your Place

A walk through my mind, oh, we're jogging now, wait is that a couch, I'm going to lie down for a bit

Confessions of a Super-Villain #3


Vanilla, pah, it is nearly as bad as butterscotch. I’m telling you the only proper pudding is chocolate. Now where were we? Oh, yes. Revenge.

I had to take something from Sasha that was just as precious to her as my eraser., and that something was her curls. Those perfect ringlets that lay perfect about her pretty little face, I would destroy them. Not only would I destroy them, I would get rid of them in such a way that only she would be at fault. It all came down to a simple item. Gum.

Gum was basically black market goods in elementary school, banned by order of the principal. Too many wads left under desks and really it is a disgusting habit. I happened to know that Sasha was one of the rule breakers though, always kept a pack of watermelon flavored gum in the left outside pocket of her backpack. I had noticed it one day weeks before and had said nothing, and now I was glad I didn’t. I knew my weapon and I had a plan in place to use it, now just to acquire it. I enlisted the help of Todd.

It happened just after our English lesson before we moved on to math. I casually raised my hand and asked for the bathroom pass. Our bags were kept on hooks outside of our classroom door, casually I strolled by and nicked the pack of gum from Sasha’s and made a beeline for the bathroom where I chewed a whole pack of gum into a sticky mess in under a minute. To this day I can’t stand watermelon flavored candy. I walked back to class holding a wad of pink goo concealed in my fist, slipping the empty pack back into Sasha’s bag. I sat back down at my desk, next to an unsuspecting, smug Sasha, who was using my eraser to furiously correct sums. Never was good at math, never was good at most academic things, though I suppose if you are pretty you don’t need to be.

Next came the distraction, happily provided my Todd. Now Todd generally was quiet but that doesn’t mean he was incapable of being loud. He leapt from his desk with a loud screech.

“Spider, There is a giant spider on my desk”

The spider was fake of course but Todd had managed to rig it so it moved using a couple rubber bands, a piece of string and a paperclip. Brilliant piece of work. His screech set everyone in motion. Girls squealed and pushed away from his desk, boys tried desperately to get closer. It was quite a bit of chaos, and chaos is what I needed. Sasha reared back and conveniently bumped into my hand. I gripped her curls and then let go, leaving behind a pink gooey ball nested in her hair. Then I just sat back and let things unfold.

The teacher’s shouting was finally able to quiet everything down and the children returned to their seats, the spider to Todd’s pocket. Sasha went to brush back her curls and encountered the sticky mass. She let out a squeal, the teacher gave her a look of longsuffering.

“What is it Miss Hornbinkle?”

“There’s gum in my hair, it’s ruined.” She sobbed out. You could see her work out who had done it in her pretty little brain. “It was her, she put gum in my hair.”

I widen my eyes and put on my best innocence act. “I don’t have gum, I don’t even chew it.”

The teacher rolled her eyes. “Both of you, open your desks.”

There of course was no gum in the desk. That would be beyond dumb. Frustrated the teacher threw up her hands. “I’ll check your bags too then.” She walked from the room and Sasha got a panic stricken look on her face. Sure enough the teacher returned with the empty pack of watermelon gum.

“Sasha, this was in your bag, that means you’ve got a weeks worth of detention, and I am sending you home now to get the gum taken out of your hair.”

Glumly Sasha gathered her things and when she leaned close enough for me to whisper in her ear I told her. “Pity, all those curls” Her face screwed up into a furious mask but she was unable to retaliate.

Never again did things go missing from my stuff again. Of course she had to have her hair cut and it turned out cuter than before. Started a brand new trend and she found other ways to get back at me, practically made me a pariah throughout all my school years. Our rivalry stagnated to quick barbs and social seclusion, it didn’t pick back up again in earnest till high school, as things often do.

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